Desired Past

In the book A Desired Past we are introduced to Aunt Leila and her partner Diantha. The author of the book was never really told straight up that her aunt was really in love with this woman or if Leila considered herself a lesbian. This part of the book made me really think how hard it must have been back then to have to hide such a strong feeling you have against someone and what a huge inconvenience it really can be. Some people really do like to show public display of affection or be able to talk to friends or family about their significant other. Years ago I'm sure that wasn't even an option to go out in public and hug and kiss your partner that is of the same sex. I also thought it was interesting when she mentioned about the 'burning of letters.' In my understanding of this section, same sex lovers used loved letters as a main means of communicating their feelings to each other without other people finding out about it. It must have been very hard to have to burn something that had such sentimental value just because you were scared that someone would stumble upon them.

One of my main reasons I took this course is to get a better understanding of the labels and try to distinguish which words are not correct to say or rude and which terms are better to use. In this book I think the author does a nice job in trying to describe if her aunt considered herself as a label of a 'lesbian' because she was a conservative lady.

I was pretty shocked when I read about the section how Sambia boys can only grow into adulthood when they swallow the semen of older men. Not only was this act not deviant but it was expected and it didn't mean anything about that persons 'sexuality.'

As I kept reading I found out that the author preferred to use the term 'same-sex-sexuality' instead of such terms as 'gay' or 'lesbian' or even 'homosexual.' I decided that I prefer this term as well. I suppose it depends upon the community and environment in which you grew up around to decide which term sounds offensive and which doesn't. I believe that in most communities that the term gay is used more often to describe a bad situation or a negative perspective on something. Due to this I don’t like the term really because I don’t know if the person I am saying it to would believe me that I am meaning to use the word in a respective way.

I learned a new word which I had never heard before, "berdaches" which are biological males who dressed an lived as women. I was also interested to learn that berdaches were an emblem that symbolizes child abuse and the violent domination of women. I would never even guess that was what that word meant.

Male Feminism

I thought the article we had to read about male feminism was very informative. When I first started reading it, I was kind of confused because I had never heard of that term before and I didn't really know there were many male feminists. As I read on I got more interested and understood the different areas and aspects of feminism. I think it is very crucial that we have male feminists because that shows that other people care and understand what women had to and still have to go through till this day. When the author went in to explain how many different advantages men have over women when it comes to careers and just their lifestyles, it was kind of a realization. Some of the examples they listed were simple things like how men can go on walks by themselves at night without feeling in danger, not worried about being asked if they plan on having children at their jobs, and the most interesting one is that men' reputation does not diminish with every person they sleep with. I don't believe it is right for women to have to put her career on hold for years and years to stay home and take care of the children and the house all by herself. Women put a lot of time and effort into their careers and men should bear just as much responsibility and be willing to stay home and take care of the child instead if necessary. I also have never understood how it is that men can sleep with countless women and not only does it not hurt their reputation but in most cases it actually helps it. I hope that someday we can overcome that stereotype and understand that if a women sleeps with a lot of men, it doesn't make her any worse of a person that if a man were to sleep with a lot of women. Another part of the article that sparked some interest was the section that described that he, the author, was a Black Gay Male and how that was a triple negation. Then I considered the fact how much a minority black males are and to make him even more of a minority he is a black gay male.

First Impressions

It was not difficult for me to chose to take this class. I knew I was interested in it and wanted to learn more. I also took it for personal reasons and to find out more about myself. The one setback I had when deciding to take this class was what everyones reaction would be to me taking this course. The first people I told were my roomates, which luckily were extremely supportive. Most of my friends were understanding. I have yet to tell my parents. I dont think the reason why I haven't told them yet is because they will be mad or disapointed, its the fact that I dont know how they will react and think of me differently. Already in the first day of this class I already felt so welcomed and accepted. I am also very interested to hear everyone else's views and thoughts through out this class.